Have you ever stumbled upon a book that completely shifts your perspective on life?

I came across Tina Seelig’s book, What I Wish I Knew When I Was 20: A Crash Course on Making Your Place in the World, while browsing Goodreads for my next read. At first, I was merely intrigued by the title. It echoed sentiments from another book I thoroughly enjoyed, The Defining Decade by Meg Jay, which emphasises the importance of making intentional choices in your twenties to shape a fulfilling future.

But of course, I know better than to judge a book by its cover—so instead, I judged it by its Goodreads rating and reviews. It quickly became clear that the book centres on entrepreneurship, and I immediately thought, ‘This book is not for me.’

In truth, I’ve always distanced myself from the concept of being an ‘entrepreneur.’ Growing up, I had no interest in business, finance, or creating world-changing products that could make me—or corporations—lots of money. I studied a health degree because I wanted to “help people,” rather than profit off them. I now realise this thinking was narrow and misguided, but more on that another time.

With all these preconceived biases, I almost clicked away to find something else. But something inside urged me to give it a chance and broaden my perspective. Boy, am I glad I did! This book has shifted the way I see things. I only wish I’d read it in my late teens—maybe I’d have walked a different path in life—though now is certainly better than never.

Book Overview

Tina Seelig, a professor who leads the Stanford Technology Ventures Program and teaches entrepreneurship and innovation, has crafted a practical guide for young adults navigating the early stages of their careers and life choices—though it’s also a valuable read for anyone facing a period of transition or self-doubt.

Filled with anecdotes from Seelig’s life and stories of entrepreneurs and innovators, the book challenges the notion of a linear career path. It empowers readers to question conventional thinking and approach life’s uncertainties with curiosity and confidence, encouraging them to carve out unique paths that reflect their true potential.

You can purchase the book on Amazon. But if physical books aren’t your thing, it’s an easy listen on Audible (we are lovers of excellent narrators here).

Key Takeaways

1) Every problem is an opportunity

Treating problems as gateways to innovation allows us to reframe challenges as opportunities. When we approach obstacles with a creative mindset, we uncover possibilities that not only benefit us personally but also spark transformative ideas capable of reshaping society. Many of the world’s greatest inventions emerge from the dynamic intersection of perceived opportunity and innovation.

To bolster this point, Seelig’s discussion about a fixed versus growth mindset really struck a chord. Most of us, myself included, like to think we lean toward a growth mindset—after all, that’s often associated with being more adaptable and successful. But listening to this chapter made me realise I’ve been operating with a pretty fixed mindset. I can’t even count the number of times my husband has suggested something, and I’d immediately come up with ten reasons why it wouldn’t work. I used to chalk it up to being logical, pragmatic, and, of course, my background in research where feasibility is critical. Looking back, I see that was just an excuse.

My perspective has recently changed. I now catch myself rethinking my capabilities, and instead of defaulting to why something might fail, I’m learning to ask: What if it works? It’s a subtle shift, but it’s already opening up possibilities in work and personal life that I wouldn’t have considered before.

2) Embrace uncertainty

Learning to embrace uncertainty encourages us to step outside our comfort zones and view the unknown as an opportunity for growth, rather than something to fear. Embracing the unpredictable not only builds resilience, but it also opens up new paths and hidden opportunities we might have otherwise missed.

I used to operate on 10-year plans: married by 25, kids by 27, living in our dream home by 30, and a clear path in academia that would lead to becoming a professor someday. To me, having a plan was a sign of self-assurance, efficiency, and a drive for success. In reality, it was a coping strategy to manage my anxiety around failure. But as it turns out, life doesn’t follow my script. Instead, I got married at 28, with no kids in sight, and we’ve pivoted down a different path for our dream of home ownership now. I no longer work in academia, either. Only one thing was certain: life is full of the unexpected.

And here’s the thing, those unexpected twists and turns have led to some of the best experiences of my life so far. Sometimes, the unexpected reveals a path that’s far richer than the one we had in mind, filled with lessons, connections, and moments that make life truly meaningful. So now, instead of clinging to rigid 10-year plans, I choose to align my life with my core values. As long as I stay true to what matters most to me—growth, authenticity, and connection—I find that I’m more open to the possibilities life offers.

3) Take calculated risks

Taking calculated risks—assessing potential rewards against the likelihood of failure—is essential for personal and professional growth. Successful entrepreneurs often invest in multiple ventures, recognising that while many may not succeed, the few that do can yield substantial returns. So, don’t shy away from stepping outside your comfort zone. New experiences can lead to unexpected breakthroughs, particularly when you’re young and have time to recover and explore alternative paths.

Starting Em Spills the Tea was actually a step into my own exploration of what calculated risk-taking looks like in my life. While starting a blog carries relatively low risk, it’s sparked something deeper—a curiosity about where this commitment to honing my writing could lead. Each post feels like a small step toward a bigger venture, one I might not even see yet. Who knows where this journey might take me… but for now, I’m enjoying the process of finding out.

5) Failure is integral to learning

Rethink traditional beliefs about failure. Setbacks aren’t dead ends—they’re feedback, a chance to recalibrate and learn. Failure is often a powerful form of redirection. It nudges us off our predetermined paths, guiding us toward alternatives we may not have considered. Instead of seeing failure as a roadblock, we can view it as a signpost, pointing us toward new opportunities and insights.

When I was 19 years old, two friends said to me: “You haven’t experienced enough failure in your life.” I was immediately offended. I had strived my whole life to achieve perfection, why would you wish failure on me? At the time, I lacked the insight to understand that failure was a teacher, often more powerful than success. It provides the hard lessons that push us to adapt, grow, and build fortitude. In the end, my friends were right. Some of my greatest failures have been my most valuable experiences.

6) The importance of self-discovery

When you’re young and your worldview is still developing, it’s easy to be swayed by the advice of others regarding career paths. While external guidance can offer valuable insights, it’s crucial to take the time to reflect on your own skills, passions, and market demands. Understanding yourself requires patience and effort. So, it’s important to keep an open mind and actively seek out diverse opportunities. Like most people, you may not get it right the first time, and that’s all part of the process. With patience and persistence, you will eventually find a path that is both meaningful and sustainable.

Wow, what a reflection of my life! My choices regarding HSC subjects, my bachelor’s degree, and my decision to pursue a PhD in academia were predominantly influenced by the advice of others rather than a deep exploration of what I truly wanted for myself. While I have no regrets about the choices I made, I can’t help but wonder how things might have been different if I had paused to listen to my own instincts and aspirations at the time.

The good news is that it’s never too late. I am now carving out time to better understand myself and pursue things that align with my core values. Who knows where things will go from here?

7) Never stop learning

The end of our learning signifies the end of our growth. By fostering curiosity, we cultivate a lifelong commitment to learning—an essential mindset in a rapidly changing world. Embracing new ideas, asking questions, and seeking diverse experiences not only enriches our understanding but also keeps us adaptable in the face of challenges.

I’m now being more intentional about diversifying the content that I consume. From books on entrepreneurship and behavioral finance to YouTube videos on the mechanics of a car, I’m exploring a wide range of topics to expand my mental models of the world.

Final Thoughts

This book has challenged me to rethink various life events that I previously considered failures, revealing how they have inadvertently shaped who I am today and who I am yet to become. It has also inspired me to push the boundaries of my comfort zone, serving as one of the reasons I started Em Spills the Tea. All of this has got me thinking: perhaps, in some sense, I am an entrepreneur after all… Something is brewing…

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